Esti (estarriel) wrote,

Yay writing

My plan to write every morning got steamrolled, as now I suddenly find myself with not only an internship that I have to do 25 hours a week, but a job that will be 10-15. Whoops.

BUT, the plan is salvageable. It might be that evening writing is better than morning writing anyway. It always used to be for me...provided I'm not too terribly exhausted.

AND, because I'll be on basically the same schedule every day (at least with respect to getting up and going to sleep -- up at 8, sleep at midnight or 1 if I keep reading, 7-8 hours' sleep per night, woo) I can try to fit writing into the evening instead. I WILL make this a priority for the summer, even if I also have to earn money and academic internship credit. I WILL!

Anyway, nothing much to say here except that I just got way into writing a segment for my latest story. Having finished almost all the nonfiction about Columbine that I could find (almost done with Brooks Brown's No Easy Answers), I now have two pieces of fiction based on it, and I see that there's really not much new stuff to add to this fictional debate (though I'm glad I'm not the only morbid writer who apparently is fascinated by it, haha)...but I still feel compelled to get this short piece to a place where it's "finished" in some respect. I also have one friend who thinks Columbine in all its darkness and morbidity is a great topic for a piece and wants to read my story, so I hope to have it done before I leave for Asia (since I'll be seeing him in Japan). So that's extra motivation, but I didn't need it. But this IS otherwise the first time I'm writing a piece "just for myself," without really worrying to much about showing it to other people, because I think other people will not so much enjoy it. (Except a few.) It's also kind of weird how much Samantha's life has become like mine, so I really am doing a weird self-insertion thing here, more than I usually allow myself to do in stories. But I think by putting myself into the story in a weird way, it lets me do what I need to do with the story. (Also if there's another character who clearly IS a lot like me, who is happy and well-adjusted, maybe people won't think I'm identifying with the suicidal/homicidal other central character. o_o)

Hmm, I dunno why I'm rambling about this, but I was just feeling particularly pleased with the 800+ words I wrote in an hour tonight, which is a good pace for me. It came very easily and I had to cut it short for bed (which I should be going to now). But I hope I can keep this up 5 of 7 nights per week! Such a good feeling.

When I finish Samantha's story, I will do Azilie's.

(Oh, her name is Samantha now, not Claire. For some reason it was really getting to me that all my characters had C names, and the way her character was evolving, I felt the name Samantha also really suited her, so it was a fairly easy switch. Fortunately it was early enough in my exploring this story that I could do that. Also I keep trying to figure out whether this is Samantha's story or Caleb's, and it's a little scary that it might the latter. As if I could write that anyway! But I realized what it is is a story about Samantha's vision of Caleb. And about what makes reality anyway.)

Man, I hope I can keep going on this flow tomorrow.

What the heck. I know I have to get up and go to an internship, but darn it, I'm still inspired.

*goes to write more*

(Geez, even the letters "TEC-9" sitting in a tab on my taskbar freak me out. Ugh. The more I read about Columbine, the more I feel strongly about gun control. I don't mean to co-opt the tragedy for my own political purposes; I rather resent people saying that. Frankly the tragedy is the alpha and omega of why I have that political purpose to begin with. But don't let me digress into a rant about the need for gun control. I have a story to write. *closes tab*)

Okay, 1,395 words for the night. I rock. Time for bed now, alas. Otherwise I'll be too sleepy to write more tomorrow! And I have to do it every day!

Will get back into the Writing Meme soon too, probably tomorrow. Yay life getting back under control.
Tags: survivor story

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